What Happened To You Two??
I found that the hardest part of the bookie “break-up” was the fact that now I have to field the “Y’all aren’t talking anymore? What Happened?” question answer period. Of course, when you start talking to someone, you seem to talk to everyone about them; All great things, nothing too personal or detailed, but it’s ok to brag about your significant other, especially when you’re excited about the potential of a future with them. However, once y’all run into trouble, you tend to be more silent about your relationship and that’s when people tend to start asking questions.
Now mind you…the reason we are no longer “talking” is because he made ZERO effort to give a fuck about a relationship with me, but at the end of the day I still got mad love for him and am a firm believer that our situation is one of those right-thing-wrong-time kinda things. Anyway, no love lost. However, today I got to thinking….
During our little time together, I met a few important people in his life: his only brother, his college roommate and best friend, his roommate, and some of his teammates. Naturally, I left a wonderful impression, had a great time with each and every one of them…even so much as to hear I was the perfect match for him. But it dawned on me that since we have stopped talking one, if not most, of those people must have asked him how we are doing… HOW THE HELL DOES HE EXPLAIN THIS MESS?!
Granted, it’s not like we are necessarily on bad terms right now, and he would have no reason to say anything negative about me. And honestly, that’s not even what I am worried about because he has mad love for me, and I know that. In fact, I find that I am more worried that he is explaining why we are not talking and failing to admit that this shit is his fault. Like, he can’t possibly tell his peoples “well, I was too busy for her and even though she made the time and valiant efforts to support me and come see me, I was still selfish and failed to give her the kind of attention she deserved”… they would tell him he is out of his fucking mind for letting such a good thing go because of some circumstances that could have been worked around.
I guess sometimes I wish I could be a fly on the wall. In this case, not just so I could hear the probable bullshit explanation but also to potentially hear some of the good things he might say about me and/or us. I, personally, put a good spin on things by saying that the reason we are no longer together is the fact that our busy schedules just weren’t conducive to that kind of relationship, and that maybe one day in the future we will be able to pick up where we left off and perhaps take it further. I figure that if I’m always positive about it, people might eventually convey that to him and he will realize that I’m not some bitter bitch who hates him for something he never meant to be malicious about. I just hope that all the questions he may have to field about our relationship will help him towards that eureka moment… “They’re right, why DID shawty and I stop talking…?