Just When I Lost Hope…
…I got exactly what I needed. Let me explain. It is officially that time of the year. Leaves are changing, the world series is about to be played, and its gettin nippy out. I think most of us are looking for someone to kick it with and stay warm; I know I am. As I have mentioned previously, my roster has been clear for quite some time now, a lot longer than I’d like to admit, to be honest…and I had decided that this isn’t always something I have the power to change, so instead of watching water boil, I would just go with the flow. This has proven to be a success!
It all started two weeks ago during the infamousMiamibirthday trip. Morgs and I were indulging in some Five Guys post-club one night (as per the usual fatassness) and Morgs got approached by this guy. Clearly intoxicated, he tried to hold a normal conversation with her, even though he asked her her name and age about 6 times. As excrutiating and hilarious as this was, he was saved by his younger, cuter brother who walked in and apologized for the drunken shambles. As we all got to talking, I realized his brother was kind of funny! Maybe this had the potential to be a cute, double-date scenario. Well in the coming days it proved to be just that, somewhat. Me and younger bro were definitely the living up that Morgs and older bro needed on their little date. Inititally, I was supposed to go to support Morgs, and little bro was supposed to be there to support his brother. Turns out Morgs and older bro weren’t really compatible, BUUUUUT me and little bro def. had a ball.
After exchanging numbers, we decided to keep in touch after the trip since the two boys would be coming up to DC in the next couple of weeks. Those next two weeks were pretty damn fun. Its crazy the type of relationship we developed via bbm and phone; it was almost like this proceeded our actual face-to-face relationship. I figured we would stay in touch just in case they needed some tour guides on their trip to DC. Little did I know, having this new person in my life would be such a breath of fresh air.
I haven’t had the pleasure of getting along with a guy on that level in so long. And ya know what? It’s kind of nice. Nice to have someone to talk to everyday, make you laugh hysterically, and simply be an outside voice to all the bullshit you have to go through on a daily basis. I am so grateful. So of course when time came for the big visit to DC, I kind of got nervous. I was worried all of the laughter and thorough conversation we had been having might not translate to our face-to-face meeting….
I was wrong. We were just the same when we saw each other, and its funny because I even found myself participating in a little PDA with him. Those that know me, KNOW I am a mush at heart, but never show it, especially in public. But for some reason, it was different this time. I felt such a level of comfort with him that I haven’t felt in a long time. It’s pretty scary. I’m not sure what to do at this point. Everything went great!! Had some good boo time and even got the pleasure of having some company in the bed with me as I slept (a feeling that I haven’t had in SOOO long). As much as I am worried about the distance being an issue, I have decided to take everything a day at a time. Fortunately, he will be back up here next weekend (and I look forward to that!) and I will get the chance to see what happens.
I think this feels so refreshing to me because he is so much different than the guys I tend to fuck with. I guess I don’t ever get mushy or open up with others because they always have walls up too and are always afraid to let go and just indulge in something. Its hard to not treat them like meat. Afterall, you only get what you put out. So if they act one way, Im going to give that right back to them. Never carefree. Always worrying about getting used for their money, settling down, etc. I think I was wrong in who I was looking for. I was attracted to the wrong qualities, I admit. And NOW that I have found someone I feel more compatible with, everything seems to fall into place. I just want to be liked for me. Nothing more, nothing less. It is nice to be around someone who loves to just joke and laugh with me and be a sweetheart, no tough guy asshole shit.