Having Sex In The Next 7 Days? Try These Tricks…
I’m sure all you ladies love spontaneous sex as much as any man does, I know I do!! However, I personally like to know when it’s about to go down (or in…) because then I can better prepare myself; you know, the usual… leg shaving, waxing/ladyscaping, fresh breath… the whole nine yards. I recently came across an article on The Frisky entitled “Sex In 7 Days” which provides some tips for you ladies to help you get sex-ready when you know you have a little rendezvous coming up.
- Getting A Flat Tummy: certain foods help your stomach appear flatter than usual, which will definitely appeal to your boo. Those approved “pre-sex foods” include grapefruit, oatmeal, and cottage cheese; unapproved pre-sex foods include cheese (besides cottage), bagels, salt, and candy—Stay away from these if you want to avoid bloating!
- What To Drink: Blues Away Tea with St. Johns Wort by Yogi: This tea claims that it promotes emotional balance, which is good if you are the type of person who cries after sex and/or who becomes livid if you can’t orgasm.
- Load up on Vitamins: 5-Htp to suppress your appetite and increase serotonin; Calcium with Vitamin D to control your calcium cravings and give you those strong bones (you obvi. needa be strong in bed!); a multi-vitamin will give you your dose of fruit and veggies
- Getting Your Body To APPEAR Toned (even though y’all should heed my advice and try to workout daily… fuck APPEARING toned, why not BE toned?): Some exercises that will make those soft-spots appear as toned as possible in 7 days include 10 minute Pilates, dancing, medicine balls, walking, butt-clenching, flexibility drills, and yoga.
- Getting Your Skin To Glow: Although a facial and full body wrap would be ideal, try simply exfoliating your face, shaving your legs with fresh razors, and tanning to appear more radiant. You know what they say… “If you can’t tone it… tan it”
- Get That Beauty Sleep: You want to be well rested and ready for your romp! Going to bed early, sprucing your dark circles up with caffeinated eye cream, and masturbating daily (gotta make sure your big O is good to go) are all things you can go to be rejuvenated and ready to rock n’ roll.
Personally…. Fuck the vitamins and the teas, go to the gym and keep ya body toned all the time…in addition to shaved legs, a fabulously lady-scaped pum pum will be all you need. Men aren’t too picky when it comes to these things… and, to be honest, the only exercises he will probably notice you’ve been doing are kegels. So you better hop to it!