40 Days, 40 Habits You Should Break; Day #35: Always Seeking Approval
Bad Habit #35: Always Seeking Approval
We are a society obsessed with seeking approval from everyone around us, regardless of whether we like them or not. Eagerly awaiting “likes” on our facebook and instagram posts from people we know, don’t know, like, and don’t like.
Our need for approval stems from the fact that we are trained to seek approval since early childhood. From having to constantly behave well to please our parents or appease our teachers to get good grades, everything seems to be based on this obedience model. When there is no model, we tend to seek approval to check if we are doing “ok” because without this we feel as though something is missing. The need for approval kills our own freedom and contributes to the loss of our own sense of direction because we are guided by others opinions.
It seems as though nowadays people are just approval whores, doing anything and everything to get a smidge of affirmation and acceptance from others. Approval whores tend to think they are being “good” when they let others have their way with them in exchange for a little bit of praise, but the reality is that their opinions shouldn’t matter enough to push us into this crazy cycle that leaves us vulnerable to being manipulated by others.
My main point here is: stop seeking approval so hard. People can pick up that you’re anxious to please them because your main priority is clearly to make sure everything is ok. You should approach people with faith that you’re a good person, because your opinion of yourself is really all that matters, and it is important to realize that it becomes a self-imposed burden when you configure your behavior toward certain people in order to garner constant reassurance of their approval.
Long story short… getting 1,500 likes on instagram for a photo with your ass out may make you feel like people are positively “approving” but the reality is you probably still have your priorities fucked up and need to get it together. Thas all I’m saying.
In case you missed it… Bad Habit #34: Spite